provocative-envy:

actual things pansy parkinson did in actual canon:

• pet a unicorn
• use draco lucius malfoy as velvet robed arm candy for the yule ball
• effectively conspire with rita skeeter to the point that she wrote??? honest to god Nice Things about her in a nationally distributed publication????
• assemble a legion of slytherin girls who followed her around and laughed at all of her jokes
• pet a unicorn
• cry when the object of her affections was injured, almost like a real? person? with? feelings?
• become a prefect
• befriend perpetually aloof blaise zabini, the arrogant, impossibly handsome son of a literal husband-dispatching feminist icon
• get habitually, semi-regularly noticed by harry james potter, who really??? kind of???? had a lot going on???? like 
• pet a fucking unicorn